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How To Last Longer In Bed - Pamela Supple

Sex therapist Pamela Supple debunks the most common myths surrounding how long men should really last in bed.

A lot of the time I get asked how long is sex supposed to last. There is no time frame. It’s purely up to you and the partner or people you are with at the time. Sex or any sexual act is very dependent on many contributing factors at the time of engagement.

Remember sex starts in the head. This may start visually, thinking sexual thoughts, fantasising or just relaxing and daydreaming. Along with sexual thoughts most people require some form of stimulation as well.

This can be touch, genital stimulation, erogenous zones being activated, visually just by watching the person/people you are with, engaging in porn or erotica, reading sexually stimulating materials, dirty talk, kink anything that is consensual and pleasing for yourself or you’re the person/person’s you are with.

Some men and women are concerned about the longevity of their sexual encounters. For some the longer sex is, the better lover they are (myth). For some men the idea of lasting over 30mins with a rock hard penis and just thrusting away with the mixture of varied positions can for the receiver become a bit monotonous.

It might seem to you that you are super stud (that’s great) but the longevity is sometimes not the required outcome. If it is the required outcome though enjoy! Connection and mutual satisfaction might be the better option sometimes. On the other hand sex might be over and done within 5 to 10mins, sometime less. It all depends on the frame of mind you are both in when you start.

Remember mutual sexual pleasure is probably preferred although some people are ok with just pleasuring their partner and not having this reciprocated. Quickies are good as well. Any sexual activity you engage in that results in mutual pleasure and sexual satisfaction is always met with a smile.

Orgasm doesn’t always have to be the final outcome, some just enjoy the closeness and connection sexual encounters provide. On the other hand if orgasm is the final destination, enjoy the ride.

If you bring variety (consensual) into the relationship/s this helps to enhance your sexual repertoire, it can also encourage you to take your time without rushing. If you really want to last for a longer period of time than you are used to, if a male, vibrating cock rings can help, sexual positions like entering from behind helps you to control the thrusting speed and being relaxed. Sometimes performance anxiety can cause quick ejaculation.

Some women prefer to be on top as this helps them to control their orgasm. For some women reaching climax very quickly is doable for some they require longer periods of time. All men and women are different in this area. Try and not compare.

The introduction of Sexual Pleasure Products can help enhance a relationship by adding variety, sexual longevity and the incorporation of some mind blowing orgasms. Pleasure Products provide a myriad of sexual stimulations and pleasure to incorporate into your sex lives and sexual playgrounds.

The use of quality and current ergonomically designed vibrators, aids, toys and play products are advisable.

Click here to view the GQ Article online